Magickal Ethics: Sex and Sacred Sex

When studying many magickal systems, Wicca included, the idea of sacred sex eventually arises. Often the term isn’t properly explained to new seekers, perhaps due to modern society’s view of sex in general. This can lead to a great deal of confusion, especially for young people new to the Craft. The most important thing to realize about sacred sex is that magickal ethics apply just as they do to any other magickal practice.

What is Sacred Sex?

There are as many differences between sex and sacred sex as there are between a cat and a dog. Both animals are cute, intelligent, and make excellent house pets. But you couldn’t exchange a cat for a dog and expect that no one would notice.

The same principle applies to sex. Sex can be a sacred thing, but sex isn’t always a sacrament. It is also important to realize that just because Wiccan and Paganism are accepting of all sexual lifestyles doesn’t mean you can freely engage in dangerous behavior or take advantage of others. There are few firm rules in Wicca, but the most universal is the Wiccan Rede: “An ye harm none, do as ye will.”

This means that it is important to act responsibility, both towards yourself and others. Magickal ethics operate on the principle that the energy you send out comes back to you. Therefore, it is in your own best interests to treat yourself and others with respect.

So how do you know if sex is sacred? Usually, if sex has a higher purpose than procreation or fun, it can be considered sacred sex. This doesn’t mean that you can’t have sex for fun or to get pregnant. You can, but that isn’t sacred sex. Sacred sex would be sex that both parties agree to with one or more of the following purposes:

• To honor the Goddess and the God; or
• To raise energy for a spell or ritual.

These goals can, of course, have many different expressions. It is the intention that defines sacred sex and sex magick, not the exact form.

Sacred Sex and Teenagers

More young adults and teenagers than ever are exploring Pagan religions, including Wicca. Though many of these people are bright and responsible, growing up isn’t easy. Things are moving faster than ever before, and we, as a society, are expecting more of young people than we have in the past.

The decision to become sexually active is on of the most difficult choices facing young people today. Teenagers of all religions and walks of life experience pressure to have sex. This is an intensely personal choice that can only be made after much personal reflection. However, it is generally accepted that teenagers should not participate in literal sacred sex. This act takes far more emotional maturity and control than most teenagers are capable of.

That does not mean that teenagers must be excluded from the sacred union of the divine. The Great Rite, which is a celebration of the union of the masculine and the feminine, can be experienced symbolically as well as literally. A teenager who understands Pagan spirituality and recognizes the sacred meaning of sex might be better off incorporating the lowering of the athame into the chalice as a representation of the divine union of the Goddess and the God.

Sex is a very powerful thing, and its connection to Paganism stretches back through the ages. From the sexual nature of Ostara to the use of sex for magick, sacred sex is an act that requires a thorough knowledge of yourself, your partner, and your goal. It should only be engaged in by fully consenting adults.